The 3 Things do Nothing

I'm very fortunate to have a number of good friends who have children the same age as mine. Some live near me, others live far away - even in other countries. I chat online and in real life with other mommies and it keeps me sane, and helps me keep some sort of perspective on this whole parenting gig.

Recent observation of my peers has left me feeling like I am perhaps a bit of a "slacker" mom lately. I'm aware that many/most/all parents have their children enrolled in some type of organized classes or sports activities.

You know. Like swimming, soccer, baseball, hockey, skating, art lessons, gymnastics, music classes, etc. If you're a parent you're thoroughly aware that there is a plethora of classes now being marketed to babies. Sign language, music, swimming, "baby art", and so on. You can basically sign a 3-month-old up for anything these days. Ready to learn Japanese? I'm confident you can find a class for the diaper-clad, toothless crowd.

After hearing moms speak of children going to the rinks for hockey practice before the sun has even risen, kids being recruited by swim clubs to train for swim meets, and the hectic pace of their lives driving their kids to activities seven days a week, it dawned on me that I have not signed the Things up for any classes in quite a long time.

Let's see . . . I did enroll them in gymnastics for a couple months last winter out of baby guilt for all the time I had to spend with Thing 3 after she was born last January. They didn't love it at all and Thing 2 never did what the rest of his class was doing. Ever. The teacher said he was "lacking attention skills" (at age TWO??) but I preferred to label him as "free spirited". Thing 1 did a swimming class at six months. We had fun, but no Michael Phelps is he. Thing 1 also did skating lessons a couple years ago . . . because I secretly had dreams of him following in his mama's blades and becoming a figure skater. And his daddy secretly has dreams of him being recruited by the NHL. Potato, Potato?

So the three Things are currently doing nothing. Nada. We drive them nowhere for lessons on any weekday, nor on the weekend. I felt a lot of guilt about this for a few months. I felt as if I ought to be fostering their skills and preparing them for the world by enrolling them in some sort of organized activity. Other people do it, so I should too. I didn't like the guilt, so I decided to confront it.

Where did that get me? Well, I've decided that it's okay for my Things to be doing nothing for right now. To just let them be, and play, and hang out with their parents and friends and go to the park and go to the pool for public swims and skate on the community-built skating rink this winter and run and jump in gigantic piles of leaves in our backyard. With so little stress and no time constraints of needing to be anywhere on time and no worries like "will they like it?" or "will they be good at it?" or "this better not be a waste of money" because deep down inside I know this cannot last forever and I truly - truly - should enjoy this while I can.

And so I am.